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Let's welcome Bono to the punditocracy

Sun, 01/11/2009 - 9:49am

The great Bono-as-columnist experiment has started at the New York Times.

And, I have to say, his debut column is a smashing success. In just his first effort, Bono has already managed to combine the worst tropes of Thomas Friedman and Maureen Dowd and fuse them together into some new alchemy of awfulness. At this rate, by March, he will have already progressed to Advanced Op-ed Babble, a state of nirvana heretofore only achieved by A.M. Rosenthal's "On My Mind".

Contest to readers: read Bono's column and, in 20 words or less, explain its theme in the comments. Here's my effort:

Did you know that I knew Frank Sinatra?"

Daniel W. Drezner | Permalink |

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( filed under:

culture | Bono | celebrity activists | foreign policy community | wtf?

)

"I'm still me, I'm still

by decisivemoment on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 11:45am

"I'm still me, I'm still cool, and I'm still not a tax exile. Honest!"

"Contest to readers: read

by Bill R on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 11:46am

"Contest to readers: read Bono's column". I lose. I couldn't even make it past the first paragraph. Darn!

Bono--the great--writer

by glennchuck on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 12:15pm

Not only am I a worldwide star and humanitarian, I am--as of now--a great writer--a point I slam home inside--a great many--em dashes. And abrupt. Sentences. Plus, I still drink in Irish pubs--thus--I am cool. Bono cool.

I tried !

by nagee76 on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 2:32pm

I tried to read it... but his op-ed writing skills are not as good as his song writing...to put it mildly.

Drivel

by dj_83 on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 2:43pm

"You are wasting five minutes of your business life, your love life, your life life."

Bono-ku

by khomotso on Sun, 01/11/2009 - 9:00pm

I am cool like Frank.
But Frank is cooler, though I
Cool for grasping Frank.

The Frank of Frank. I.

HEY EVERYONE,

by washboardalex on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 5:29am

LOOK AT MY HYPERBOLE. EVERYONE! MY HYPERBOLE!!!

Bono's article "contest"

by Mehmet on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 8:32am

Bono shares in the NYT his unique experience of friendship with the singer of "NY,NY" which, among other things, taught him humility over hubris..

A story...

by obie on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 9:18am

A sultry vision, a dream. Watch me turn it--me, Bono!--into a crappy metaphor about America.

He Did It His Way

by Appalled Moderate on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 9:53am

I did my column my way. Though I did it that way while soaked in overindulged in whine (er, wine).

Bono

by Pat Frost on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 11:59am

I am famous. I met another famous person. Read my incoherent thoughts on said other famous person. I am famous.

Congratulations, all of you,

by trevoshea on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 1:07pm

Congratulations, all of you, on your masturbatory comments thread. It is greatly amusing to see that even professors and readers of Foreign Policy can be completely unable to understand prose. I'll help you out!

Bono was writing about Frank Sinatra, life, innocence, and art. His target audience? NOT YOU.

Why are you even talking about this on Foreign Policy? Do you really think the purpose of celebrity advocacy is to target people who read Foreign Policy? Do you really think Bono was writing a column about anything that is relevant to Foreign Policy?

Hey, Drezner, if you want to make fun of shit that has nothing to do with foreign policy, go get some space on Blogger.

But What Did He Say, Trevoshea?

by Appalled Moderate on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 1:58pm

Trvoshea:

I agree Drezner's likening Bono's column to the well-travelled cliche mongering of Friedman was a bit unfair. Old Tommy Friedman has got to be feeling a bit crowded and hot by this comment.

Because Bono's column resembles nothing more than the sort of rock critic blovation one might find in an alternative weekly in a medium sized American city. (You know, the free newspaper with all the music reviews and sex ads that thinks it's as good as the Village Voice?) There's been a lot said about Sinatra (and Miles Davis, for that matter), and Bono's gloss is not profound, revealing new information, or coherent.

Sounds ripe for mockery to me,

Isn't it ironic that I

by Will in STL on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 3:43pm

Isn't it ironic that I attempt to overcompensate for my height with abrupt sentences?

Wannabe Mitch Albom

by omaniphil on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 7:01am

Wannabe Mitch Albom

When I type

by mack the knife on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 3:47pm

words appear on the screen. Empty screen. Filled with words like liquor in a glass. Ready for a toast. Toast words.

Mmmmmmm...

by Beckylooo on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 4:09pm

...beer.

Bono

by unclesmedley on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 4:57pm

"Pedantic, supercilious bloggers don't understand how interpretive skills generally gain in the course of a life well abused. Fuck 'em."

Bono

by Waynski77 on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 4:31pm

I know many adjectives and I shall use them all.

Seriously

by unclesmedley on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 5:10pm

The abject snobbery about Bono's column is a wee bit pitiful. Does anyone suppose that he submitted this piece in the hopes of publication? Of course not. He's a celebrity rock star with a reasonably impressive extra-curricular CV.

The New York Times was looking for -- nay, desperate for --

an attraction and, apparently, they succeeded. Danny D and his 20-Word Wonders come across as resentful--not so much of the lackadaisical, flow-of-conscious style, as of the fact that he got the gig and wasn't even looking for it. Do you think Bono needs the Times? Really? For what?

I'm no big fan of Bono. U2's alright, I suppose. I liked Joshua Tree. But I've been more impressed by the fact that this no-account Irish guy has become one of the most well-known people in the world--and not in the Paris Hiltonish sense, but more in the Bill Gates/Al Gore mold.

Accordingly, Like Bill and AL--and Frank Sinatra--he now gets to do whatever he wants. And all these talented, smart people on this comment thread have to keep their day jobs.

Ain't life a b****?

Bono

by nigorb on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 4:55pm

Fool most world leaders, most of the time - check.
NYT readers - not so much.

Perfect

by unclesmedley on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 5:12pm

So true. Readers of the NY Times are the most smartest people in the whole wide world.

I agree, the writing doesn't

by Macgreiner on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 7:13pm

I agree, the writing doesn't make for flowing prose, but your suggestion about the readers of the NYT trumps any of Bono’s unsubstantiated claims or bloated self-congratulatory rhetoric.

bono

by waterboardmeplz on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 5:18pm

sophomoric suede vinegar cool.
yessss. oh yesss.

[soft jazz in background]

Bono

by Dubious on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 6:46pm

I'm Irish. I'm smart. And I'm almost as pretentious as Dick Cavett.

Lame

by ohiomeister on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 7:05pm

I'm referring to Dan and those leaving comments, not Bono. I thought his story about Frank Sinatra was interesting and amusing, and I don't see the harm in using Frank's life and My Way, one of his well known songs, to speak metaphorically about the current American moment.

Besides, who would possibly want to read something written by one of the best known humanitarians in the world when you can leave snarky comments on an obscure FP blog?? Lucky me, I got to do both!

Bushian slip

by christopherg on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 7:21pm

And he referred to America where in the article

Giving it an honest shot

by christopherg on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 7:20pm

We did it My Way. Didn't all go well.
We'll keep singing it, ever deeper, till it's time to go.

in explanation, i can't do

by samdupont on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 8:21pm

in explanation, i can't do better than to quote his own words:

"This singer, i.e. me, is in a puddle."

The Gist of Bono's Op-Ed

by Harry Haller on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 8:30pm

"In case you didn't know it before, I'm a tool."

I Bono am of the pub. I Bono

by gancelin on Mon, 01/12/2009 - 9:11pm

I Bono am of the pub. I Bono Still live in Dub. I Bono did sing with Frank. Yellow painting.

"Regrets, I've had a few..."

by Matthew Goggins on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 5:38am

We need to remember to keep the romance of life alive in times of loss and uncertainty. Thanks, Frank.

[ I thought Bono's debut was super, very strong. His topic was timely and the presentation was thoughtful and heartfelt. I look forward to reading his next Op-Ed. ]

Yes Thoughtful

by 12InchesOfHangi... on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 8:08am

And weird and goofy and full of pretension.

But hey, he's BOBO...er...BONO so we must listen.

Yes listen. Like a breath of air on the breeze of life.

Would you like to explain "pretentious" a bit more?

by Matthew Goggins on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 2:19pm

Thank you for your reaction, I have a few questions/comments.

When you're a rock star and an international celebrity, is silence the only way to avoid sounding self-important?

Is there anything the man could have written that would not have been pretentious in your view?

Bono's Op-Ed made me think about Sinatra and his music; about the passage of time and the meaning of individualism. It brought back some forgotten memories and put them in a new context.

When you claim Bono's writing is pretentious, are you referring to the objective hard copy that he produced, or are you referring to a subjective reaction that is provoked in some readers but not in others? And if pretentiousness can only be determined by the reactions it provokes, then what percentage of turned-off readers would demonstrate Bono's: 75%, 10%, 50% plus one?

"Does this column make me

by Mr. Bingley on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 9:30am

"Does this column make me look fat?"

Bono's Editorial

by agentyx on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 9:34am

"I'm drunk, but did you know the failure of the new Irish economy is like Frank Sinatra's singing careers... somehow?"

Bono's blather

by RightWingConspiracy on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 9:47am

I've written 750 words ... still need 250 more.

I'll take a shot

by peachboy on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 10:13am

First Attempt:

Frank Sinatra's music is unsentimental, original, and complex, and provides meaningful lessons appropriate for the times.

Second Attempt:

I know Frank Sinatra and you don't.

i think it's a nice piece

by sarah rolph on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 10:20am

I enjoyed Bono's column. Sure, it rambles a bit, but I think he pulls it off pretty well.

I think the theme of the piece is: be yourself, roll with the punches, there will be good times and bad times and you won't always know which is which.

Seems like a nice theme for a New Year's piece, and I enjoyed the personal tidbits about Sinatra.

I would venture that his writing is a lot better than most of our singing.

Bono Column in 20 Words

by Mandy Cat on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 10:57am

Me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me!

My attempt: "If you wonder

by 123rh456 on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 11:39am

My attempt: "If you wonder why the NY Times is failing, just read my new column."

Bono 20 words or less

by Rachel1700 on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 2:54pm

I AM. Ah--Dark and stormy! Knight!!

Bono 20 words or less...

by KevinT on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 4:35pm

Meh.

funny...

by spiralforward on Thu, 01/15/2009 - 1:40am

what i read was about the complicated facets of sentamentality in the midst of purported change, using sinatra and booze as illustrative vehicles.
my bad.